The Daily Dose/September 15, 2020
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy
Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience.
HUT, HUT, HIKE: It certainly didn’t take long for the Big Ten Conference to take up the matter of playing football this season. Only a couple days after watching other conferences playing games – albeit in empty or almost-empty stadiums – and cashing TV network checks, they are considering playing a season that would begin in October.
Bully for them. If they think they can safely play without the punt team getting COVID, go ahead and play. It’s football season after all, and there is going to come a time when we are going to have to come to terms with COVID and the sooner that happens the better.
Fly In The Ointment: Be careful, though. It’s all fun and games until the back-up long-snapper dies of COVID. Now, we’re not doctors here, nor have we ever played one on TV, but we don’t think that is likely to happen but it could and we don’t think you can really argue with either appraisal. It is entirely possible that next year the decision not to play will be looked upon as prudent.
Dry, Technical Matter: The Pac-12 Conference, which also voted to suspend play, is less likely to take the matter up as half of their teams, the ones in California and Oregon, aren’t even allowed to practice.
The Bottom Line: We’ve long been of the opinion here that there is really no point in resuming games until fans can pay their way without restriction. Everything else is just some dickhandling designed to make some money and sell us beer and pickup trucks.
Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually.
The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow appears to be losing his mind.
32-243: these are notes I made for today’s entry. I have some zero clue what they mean…Apologies are issued.
Backstairs at the Monte Carlo: Gaylon gives Radtke some of his crappy furniture.
After I had turned in my scanner I was BSing with Radtke, who was manning Eddie – 2. We ended up discussing furniture, and it provided an interesting insight into the bachelor furniture underground.
My friend Debbie is getting new furniture. Debbie’s a classy broad and her old stuff is very nice and I am getting some of it, at no charge to yours truly, of course. I offered Radtke my old furniture because all he has is a futon and a TV and he snapped up my offer, without even being entirely sure what he was getting. The understanding amongst us bachelors is I wouldn’t have offered it if it didn’t meet certain, rock bottom standards, meaning it’s more or less bug-free and not completely ripped to shreds.
Free Stuff
The same trick the drug dealers use.
Backstairs at the Monte Carlo: Clock in with the graveyard crew of the Monte Carlo Security Department on the glamorous Las Vegas Strip. – Click here for the first two months of the funniest Vegas memoir ever.
Criminals, Courtesans and Constables: Gaylon’s latest novel takes place everywhere from throne rooms to death row. – Click here to read the first four chapters with our compliments.
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On This Date
The long march to today.
In 1916 – Tanks are used for the first time in war, when the English and the French fight the Germans in the Battle of the Somme in northern France in World War I. Utilized by the British, their success was limited due to their limited numbers and tactical ineffectiveness. The battle had started in July and would end in November with an indifferent Allied victory. Three million men fought in the battle, with about a third dying, making it one of the largest and deadliest battles in history.
In 1978 – Muhammed Ali regains the world heavyweight boxing title, defeating champion Leon Spinks in a unanimous decision at the New Orleans Superdome. Spinks had defeated Ali in a split decision in Las Vegas in February to claim the title in only his eighth professional bout. With the win, Ali became the first heavyweight to win the title three times and the $6 million gate was the largest in the history of professional boxing at that time.
In 1958 – Nel Blu, Dipinto Di Blu, commonly known as Volare, by Domenico Modugno is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the fourth of five non-consecutive weeks. The song also peaked at #10 in Great Britain, at #2 on Billboard’s soul chart and was Billboard’s #1 song of the year. It was the only Top 40 hit for Modugno and only a #97 smash the following year prevented him from being an ultimate one-hit-wonder: an act whose only chart single hits #1. Modugno would later serve in the Italian Parliament and the song has hit the charts several times since.
Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.
One may talk of peace only with those who are peaceful. To talk of peace with him who holds a drawn sword is foolish unless one is unarmed, then one must talk very fast, indeed. – Louis L’Amour The Walking Drum
Answer To The Last Trivia Question
It’s not who you know, but what you know.
Eric Clapton’s biggest hit on the Billboard Hot 100 as a member of a group came as a member of Cream when Sunshine of Your Love peaked at #5 in 1968.
Today’s Stumper
Cheaper than Trivia Night at the bar.
What’s the largest live gate in professional boxing history? – Answer next time!
