The Daily Dose/October 18, 2020
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy
The Sunday Bottom 5
The very best of the very worst of the week that was.
1. College Football – Go ahead and cash your TV checks, guys…Sure, games are getting postponed, but these problems can be dealt with and don’t really matter anyway…What’s going to happen, though, 20 years from now when formers players are getting sick from things that are directly attributable to having caught COVID in 2020?
2. Nick Saban– Sunday Bottom 5 pollsters “pretty sure” it’s possible to have a positive COVID test followed by three negative tests, but for the sainted Alabama coach the week of the big game vs Georgia???…Sure, that’s believable.
3. Lauren Daigle – In her 106th non-consecutive week at #1 on Billboard’s Christian singles chart – an all-time record for any Billboard singles chart – with You Say…All-time Billboard chart of record of 110 weeks (Wendy Carlos, Switched-On Bach, Classical Album chart, 1969-72) now squarely in crosshairs.
4. Election 2020 – 16 days until America heralds to the world – and itself – whether it’s content with the status quo or is ready to make some changes…You would think choice between lying sexual predator who believes moon is part of Mars and a former vice president who knows the moon is not part of Mars would have been decided by Labor Day, but Sunday Bottom 5 pollsters still “pretty sure” Biden will win anyway.
5. President Trump Fact Check – The 5-hole staple, click here for the latest delusions from America’s Liar-in-Chief. Provided by the Associated Press.
Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually.
The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow has the latest MPG figure for the new ride.
I filled up after the hotel and I knew it would be tuff because the trip odometer hadn’t even reached 400 miles yet…Now, I know we can round up to 38 and stuff – and that’s pretty close to 40 – but regular readers of this crap know we don’t do that here, and I’d hate to think they heady days – lasting most of this year – of flirting and exceeding 40 MPG are over, tho the rending of garments has been put off indefinitely.
Backstairs at the Monte Carlo: The Prime Rib Era is over in the employee dining room.
I am trying to be strong here, and I know you are, too. I went in today and Daryl said somebody had the nerve to complain about something or another. I don’t remember exactly – I wasn’t thinking entirely straight at this time – but I think it had something to do with an idiot employee complaining about the fact he didn’t heat his cut up enough and he went to Daryl’s supervisor to whine and Daryl said fuck it, he didn’t need this.
And he’s right, of course. He was providing this splendid public service on his own, infiltrating room service every night and stealing a slab or two, but, as usual, it’s the little guy that ends up taking the broom handle.
Free Stuff
The same trick the drug dealers use.
Backstairs at the Monte Carlo
Clock in with the graveyard crew of the Monte Carlo Security Department on the glamorous Las Vegas Strip.
Click here for the first two months of the funniest Vegas memoir ever.
Criminals, Courtesans and Constables
Gaylon’s latest novel takes place everywhere from throne rooms to death row.
Click here to read the first four chapters with our compliments.
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On This Date
The long march to today.
In 1648 – The first trade union in what would become the United States is formed when shoemakers in Boston receive a charter from the Massachusetts Bay Colony for the Company of Shoomakers. They formed the guild not because they were disappointed in their earnings, but because of the “occasion of bad ware” turned out by some area cobblers and the desire to enact certain standards of quality. Some sources list Boston coopers as receiving a charter on this date, too.
In 1977 – Reggie Jackson of the New York Yankees ties the World Series record for most home runs in a game in a series-clinching 8-4 victory over the Los Angeles Dodgers in Game 6. Jackson had three home runs to tie the record established by Babe Ruth, also of the Yankees, in 1926, a feat he repeated in 1928. The feat was equaled by Albert Pujols of the St Louis Cardinals in 2011 and by Pedro Sandoval of the San Francisco Giants in 2012.
In 1969 – The Temptations are at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the first of two consecutive weeks with I Can’t Get Next to You. The song was also in its third of five consecutive weeks at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart and was Billboard’s third-biggest song of the year. It was the second of four #1 songs on the Hot 100 for the group and their tenth of 15 #1 songs on the soul chart. A version by Al Green also hit the Hot 100 and soul chart the following year.
Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.
…only a few can preserve the just medium, and neither tear up what the ancients have correctly established nor despise the just innovations of the moderns.
Francis Bacon
Answer To The Last Trivia Question
It’s not who you know, but what you know.
The Four Tops’ biggest hit on Billboard’s soul chart was I Can’t Help Myself, which spent nine weeks at #1 in 1965.
Today’s Stumper
Cheaper than Trivia Night at the bar.
Who else has hit three home runs in a postseason game? – Answer next time!
