The Daily Dose/November 1, 2020
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

The Sunday Bottom 5
The very best of the very worst of the week that was. More or less.  

1. President Donald Trump – You would think a lying sexual predator who believes 1) the moon is part of Mars and that the Revolution was won when the Continental Army secured British airports would not be in danger of being reelected, but you’d be wrong. 

2. Joe Biden – From the start we thought Biden was only running to prevent Trump’s reelection – a noble cause – and would not have minded staying retired…No matter…Democrats could have nominated a picture frame and we would have voted for it. 

3. Lauren Daigle –  Latest single You Say at 108th non-consecutive week at #1 on Billboard’s Hot Christian Singles chart, two weeks shy of tying Wendy Carlos’ all-time Billboard record of 110 weeks at #1 (Switched-On Back, 110 weeks, Classical Album chart)… Zach Williams and Dolly Parton still bravely holding down runner-up spot with There Was Jesus. 

4. United States Congress – Show of hands member of Congress, how many think perpetual war and mindless spending are bad???…Good, everyone…Another show of hands: how many of you did anything about it???…All hands down…Thank you for playing…It’s time for a change. 

5. President Trump Fact Check – The 5-hole staple, click here for the latest from the man who believes the 1918 Spanish Flu epidemic helped end World War II…Hot off the presses from the Associated Press. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow goes to a room whose guest whined about her heater not working.  

I get to 259 and knock and after more time than you’d think the door is answered, by a rather attractive woman about my age and ol’ Sparrow – just for funsies – is about to cue the cheesy porn music until a rugrat is spotted sleeping on the pull-out couch immediately inside the door…I strongly suspect the woman had, rather recently, been taking advantage of our state’s rather permissive weed laws because after opening the door she looked at me for a few seconds as if wondering why I was there…In fact, she may not have been entirely clear I was a hotel employee…I mean, technically, it’s Halloween so maybe she thought I was the stripper she ordered costumed up as a nite auditor. 

On This Date
The long march to today.

In 1512 – Michelangelo’s frescoes on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel are displayed to the public for the first time. Michelangelo had been commissioned for the work in 1508 by Pope Julius II and – considering himself primarily a sculptor – had wanted to decline the work, also believing it was a plot by his enemies to discredit him. The paintings are a combined 131 feet long and 43 feet wide and a 10-year restoration project was completed in 1994.

In 2010 – The San Francisco Giants win their first World Series since moving from New York in 1958, defeating the Texas Rangers 3-1 in Game 5. The Giants scored all their runs in the seventh inning on a home run by Edgar Renteria and Tim Lincecum pitched eight innings and Brian Wilson earned the save. It was the sixth World Series title for the Giants since winning their first in 1905 and they would also win the World Series in 2012 and 2014. 

In 1980 – Barbra Streisand is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the second of three consecutive weeks with Woman in Love. It was ninth of ten Top `10 hits for Streisand and her fifth and final #1 song. The song also went to #1 in 19 other countries including Norway, Zimbabwe and Great Britain though due to when it charted it was Billboard’s 35th biggest hit of 1981. The song was written by Barry and Robin Gibb. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

I work harder than anyone who has ever lived. I am not well and worn out with this stupendous labor, and yet I am patient to achieve the desired end. 
Michelangelo
Letter to brother, while painting Sistine Chapel

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
It’s not who you know, but what you know. 

The Rolling Stones have had nine #1 albums in the United States. 

Today’s Stumper
Cheaper than Trivia Night at the bar. 

How many #1 songs has Barbra Streisand had in Great Britain? – Answer next time!

There are two ways for you to get in on the laughs. 

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