The Daily Dose/September 4, 2020
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy
Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience.
Leading Off will return.
Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually.
The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow works the land.
I had a busy day in the yard…Not as busy as originally planned, but still busy enuff…First off, all the branches from the recent storm were cleared out, a tedious job I’ve never particularly liked…Or, more accurately, the branches that were too big for the lawnmower to chop up were picked up, and there was no small number of those…These were put in a pile next to the carport…The plan was to use an electric recently purchased for this evolution and to cut the branches up for easy disposal in the trash can, but yours truly ended up being too tired to do this.
Backstairs at the Monte Carlo: Day shift is over-staffed.
I hate day shift. I sat in on their briefing today as I was preparing for my CPR update class and crap, they had twelve Charlie units, which we haven’t had in the memory of man. The briefing room was packed and I found myself shaking my head: twelve Charlie units for a shift that does basically squat in the first place is obscene…
The Bottom Ten Presented By COVID-19/NFL Week 1: With the Bottom Ten pollsters taking the year off, they are pleased to trot out NFL Week 1 column from 2016. The Bottom Ten is offered with our compliments this year.
Sure, all eyes are on the anticipated dog fight between Tennessee and Cleveland, but veteran Bottom Ten fan(s) know you ignore the long shots only at your peril. The race for The Dan Henning Trophy is a 16-week sentence that only the weak, unfocused and untalented survive.
Free Stuff
The same trick the drug dealers use.
Backstairs at the Monte Carlo
Clock in with the graveyard crew of the Monte Carlo Security Department on the glamorous Las Vegas Strip.
Click here for the first two months of the funniest Vegas memoir ever.
Criminals, Courtesans and Constables
Gaylon’s latest novel takes place everywhere from throne rooms to death row.
Click here to read the first four chapters with our compliments.
The Regular Guys
Coming soon! Meet Lenny and Larry, two comedians going nowhere on their own who team up and become the biggest act in show business.
Click on the button to get started to read The Diary of a Nobody, Backstairs at the Monte Carlo and Criminals, Courtesans and Constables for only $4.99, a steal.
On This Date
The long march to today.
In 1888 – George Eastman receives a US patent for “improvements in the form, construction, and arrangement of parts” of the camera. Eastman also registered the trademark Kodak, a word he made up, on this date. In 1884 Eastman had received two patents for photographic film, never married and left his entire estate to the University of Rochester. He killed himself in 1932 while suffering from assorted painful ailments.
In 1950 – The Southern 500 – the first 500-mile race in NASCAR history – is run for the first time at Darlington Raceway in South Carolina. Johnny Mantz was the winner, with an average speed of 75.250 mph in what would be his only NASCAR win. 80 entrants had shown up and qualifying for the race took two weeks. Today the race is known as the Cook Out Southern 500, after a chain of southern fast-food restaurants. The race is actually 501 miles long and the 2020 edition will be run this Sunday.
In 1978 – Play That Funky Music by Wild Cherry is at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart – then known as the Hot Soul Singles chart – for the first of two consecutive weeks. The song would later spend three weeks at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 was their fifth biggest song of the year. It was the first chart single for the group, remains their only Top 40 appearance on either chart and was the third of six consecutive weeks a white act had held the top spot on Billboard’s soul chart, as the song was both preceded and followed at #1 by KC and the Sunshine Band. In 1991 a version of the song by Vanilla Ice peaked at #22 on Billboard’s soul chart and at #4 on the Hot 100.
Quotebook
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.
To my friends, my work is done – Why wait? GE – George Eastman’s suicide note.
Answer To The Last Trivia Question
It’s not who you know, but what you know.
The current land speed record is 760.343 mph by British Royal Air Force fighter pilot Andy Green. He set the record on Oct 15, 1997, in northwest Nevada.
Today’s Stumper
Cheaper than Trivia Night at the bar.
What was NASCAR’s second 500-mile race? – Answer next time!
