The Daily Dose/November 14, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy
Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience…
Leading Off will return.
Today At The Site
The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow has a moderately funny exchange with a guest. Today’s Diary.
Had a funny exchange – well, a sort of funny exchange – with a guest this morning…He came down to buy his half-off breakfast coupon for the restaurant and he had come down yesterday and I didn’t remember his name…I acknowledged this glaring hole in my hospitality and offered apologies.
– Oh, don’t even…How many people do you see in a day???:
This is a standard response…The answer is usually two, but if they want to think I see hundreds of people every night, so be it. I was bending over a bit filling in his coupon and I stood up and made the sign of the cross in a manner that would’ve had the pope achieving and maintaining a state of arousal.
– Bless you my son…You are gracious.
– I mean, if this was a $5,000 a night palace…
– Hell, then I would know your blood type…
It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.
The Bottom Ten/NFL Week 12: It’s the race for the most coveted trophy in sports: The Dan Henning Trophy, symbolic of NFL Bottom Ten supremacy.
Here are some funny lines from this week’s NFL Bottom Ten:
Giants earn Ed Koch Kup, symbolic of Gotham football ineptitude, with huge road loss to Jets that wasn’t secured until clutch fumble on final drive…
Falcons playing with B-10 fire, as with depth of 2019 B-10 field, even one (1) more win could spell disaster for title chances…
Focus important this week, as Browns cannot get caught looking ahead 11/24 showdown with Dolphins.
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On This Date
In 1889 – Nelly Bly, a reporter for the New York World, begins a trip to travel around the world in 80 days, an adventure inspired by Jules Verne’s 1873 novel Around the World in Eighty Days. Bly left Hoboken, New Jersey by ship and after arriving in England traveled through the Middle East and Asia before sailing to San Francisco and taking a train back to New York. It took Bly 72 days to make her journey, and she traveled and estimated 25,000 miles.
In 1943 – Sid Luckman of the Chicago Bears establishes new NFL records for most passing yards and most touchdown passes in a game throwing for 433 yards and seven touchdowns in 56-7 win over the New York Giants. Luckman broke Cecil Isbell’s record of 333 yards in a game, established in 1942, and broke Sammy Baugh’s single-game touchdown record of six established two weeks earlier. Luckman’s touchdown record has been tied seven times, most recently by Drew Brees in 2015 while, Luckman’s single-game passing record has been topped many times, with the record now held by Norm Van Brocklin of the Los Angeles Rams, who threw for 554 yards in a 1951 game.
In 1952 – Al Martino has the first #1 song on the first British popular music chart, with Here in My Heart at #1 on the New Musical Express magaizne’s chart for the first of nine consecutive weeks. Over the years other sources published charts in Britain and the official British chart is now published by the Official Charts Company. Earlier, the song had peaked at #1 on Billboard’s Best Sellers in Stores chart. To date, there have been 1,359 #1 songs on the British chart and the current #1 song Dance Monkey by Tones and I, now in its sixth week at #1.
Quotebook
No god who cared about his creation would abandon the innocent.
Cameron Todd Willingham
Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Ray Mancini oringinally won the WBA lightweight title from Arturo Frias, with a first-round knock out on May 8, 1982.
Today’s Stumper
What was Nelly Bly’s real name? – Answer next time!
