The Daily Dose/Sunday, May 5, 2019

The Daily Dose/May 5, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

The Sunday Bottom V
The very worst of the week that was:

  1. US Mass ShootingsThoughts and prayers remain growth industry as American shooting gallery remains open…While usual people issue usual calls for laws criminals will not obey, real problem rests in violent American government producing violent American citizens.
  2. Legal WeedIllinois governor announces residents will be allowed to purchase government-controlled weed starting in 2020…Exactly why remaining Americans tolerate government telling them what they can and cannot smoke still not immediately clear.
  3. MLB AttendanceWhile TV and streaming numbers still solid, fewer and fewer people going out to ballgame anymore, as MLB attendance down again in 2019…While per-game drop not as bad as 2018 – yet – 19 of 30 teams are reporting attendance declines.
  4. New College Football Bowl Games – NCAA authorizes three (3) new bowl games for 2020 in Gdansk, Poland, Tangiers, and Amundson-Scott Station…Criteria for bowl game eligibility dropped from six (6) wins to a couple good weeks of spring practice and smacking around at least one MAC oppenent.
  5. US Drone StrikesAs US drone strikes continue to kill mostly adult, military personnel, Pentagon leaders wondering how much damage they could really do if Congress actually declared war on Afghanistan, Yemen, Somalia, which they haven’t done because Congress hasn’t declared war on anyone since World War II. 

Today At The Site
The Diary of a Nobody
Sparrow’s first solo end of the month at the hotel went well, and the robins are back at The Shire, though they’ve moved their nest. Today’s Diary.

End of month at the hotel appeared to have gone OK…Recall Wednesday I was on my own for the end of the month festivities for the first time and I wasn’t entirely certain I remembered everything…Evidently, tho, I winged it pretty good because Brandon didn’t have me report for beating when I showed up and there were no emails from Candace or GM Barbara announcing assorted manifestations of my incompetence.

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

Endless drivel: please click on the button to read The Diary of a Nobody. $5.99 includes all entries, past, present, and future.

Criminals, Courtesans, and ConstablesFriends, my latest novel is now available, for $3.99 until later this week when the price goes up a couple of bucks. Criminals, Courtesans, and Constables is about a nice guy who runs high-class call girls in and out of 5-star suites and throne rooms, collects ransoms and runs from the constables. Hilarity ensues. Seriously.

Click here to read excerpts and a sample chapter.

On This Date
In 1961 – Alan Shephard becomes the second human and the first American to fly in space, flying Freedom 7 in a 15 minute, 22-second sub-orbital flight. Shephard reached and altitude of 101.2 nautical miles and flew 263.1 nautical miles downrange and reached a speed of 5,180 mph before returning to Earth.

In 1973 – Secretariat, ridden by Ron Turcotte, wins the Kentucky Derby in a record time of 1:59 2/5, defeating Sham by two-and-a-half lengths. It was the second consecutive Kentucky Derby win for Turcotte and Secretariat and Turcotte would later win the Preakness and Belmont stakes to win the triple Crown. This Kentucky Derby remained the only sub-two minute Kentucky Derby until Monarchos won the 2001 Derby in 1:59.97.

In 1979 – Peaches and Herb are at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the first of four consecutive weeks with Reunited. It would be the only #1 song for the duo, and the song also went to #1 in Canada and was Billboard’s 5th biggest hit of 1979. Reunited was also in its second of four weeks at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart.

Quotebook
I grew fond of her company, and at this time being under no religious restraints, I attempted familiarities (another erratum), which she repulsed with proper resentment.
Benjamin Franklin
Autobiography

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Willie Mays currently ranks fifth on the all-time major league home run list. The closest active player to him is Albert Pujols, with 638 home runs.

Today’s Stumper
How many Peaches have been part of the Peaches and Herb duo with Herb Fame? – Answer next time!

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