The Daily Dose/May 8, 2022
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™
The Sunday Bottom 5
A ranking of some things.
1. Russian/Ukrainian War – SB5 pollsters still LOLing over Russian claims that outside meddling is not constructive…What did Russia expect, the rest of the world to stand by and discuss mutual funds while Ukraine was destroyed???…Actually, we’re doing a pretty good job of that right now, though sending some weapons allows us to look ourselves in the mirror every morning.
2. Supreme Court Leak – Your moral view of abortion is your lookout not ours, but SB5 pollsters remain “pretty sure” that having our government interfering in on what happens in a doctor’s office is wrong and that they should butt out of the abortion debate because what next will they want to interfere with???
3. Donald Trump – The 3-hole staple…Instead of being banished in shame – not to mention tried – for leading the January 6 insurrection, instead of being reviled for the blood on his hands for an inept coronavirus response, instead of being dismissed for believing the moon is part Mars, ignorant blatherskite continually heralded as the pacesetter for the 2024 GOP nomination.
4. NCAA – SB5 pollsters excited as you are to have college athletes able to pimp themselves out for money just like their coaches and the NCAA have done for decades…NCAA, long pimp, whore, and john simultaneously, now appealing to similar organization – Congress – for some friendly legislation in the matter.
5. MLB – Once proud, currently dying sport has seen an average of 4.56 pitchers per game, with each team having already used an average of 19 pitchers, a figure that was about average for an entire season 30 years ago…These 570 or so pitchers have combined for exactly two (2) complete games, about one every two weeks.
Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually.
Give me an “R”! It’s Read Free Sunday (RFS) at The Diary.
The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow sets a record in the sack. Today’s Diary.
Yours truly should probably look into sending the pillow to the Sleeping Hall of Fame or something…God bless all of you.
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On This Date
History’s long march.
In 1886 – Coca-Cola is served for the first time, at an Atlanta drug store, as a patent medicine. It was invented by pharmacist John Pemberton – who had suffered injuries while serving with the Confederacy in the Civil War – who wanted to produce a pain killing alternative to the morphine he was addicted to. The exact make-up of the earliest versions of Coca-Cola – like today’s recipe – remains a mystery and Pemberton – who had both physical and financial troubles – sold Coca-Cola two years later.
In 1993 – Lennox Lewis defends his WBC heavyweight boxing title with a 12-round unanimous decision over Tony Tucker in Las Vegas. Lewis had become WBC champion after Riddick Bowe, also the IBF and WBA champion, relinquished the title after being unable to come to terms with Lewis over a title fight. Lewis would lose the title to Oliver McCall the following year, and would later regain the WBC title, as well as earn IBF, WBA, WBC, and IBO heavyweight titles.
In 1971 – The Jackson 5 is at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart – then known as the Best Selling Soul Singles chart – for the second of three consecutive weeks with Never Can Say Goodbye. The song also peaked at #2 on the Hot 100 and was the fifth of six #1 soul singles for the group and their sixth of eleven Top 10 pop hits, figures that include totals as the Jacksons. In 1975 a version by Gloria Gaynor peaked at #9 on the Hot 100 and in 1988 a version by the Communards peaked at #51.
Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.
I shall simply ask. Many things are not done simply because they are not attempted.
Louis L’Amour
The Walking Drum
Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.
Thriller replaced the soundtrack from Saturday Night Fever as the biggest selling album of all time.
Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.
What was the first diet soft drink offered by Coca-Cola? – Answer next time!
