We usually charge for this crap, but The Bottom Ten is on the house this year.
The Bottom Ten/NFL Week 8
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy
And then there is one.
It’s not easy to go unvictoried in the NFL – or at least not as easy as the Jets are making it look – and after the Giants won the Jets are now the team to beat – literally – in the quest for The Dan Henning Trophy – symbolic of NFL Bottom Ten lousiness.
Bottom Ten fan(s) everywhere are reveling in what might well be the deepest Bottom Ten field ever. In fact, it’s so tough last week’s co-#1, the Giants, fell all the way to #10 with their win.
This week’s mess as the nags are in the backstretch:
1. New York Jets (0-6; lost to Miami 24-0) – Jets have throne all to themselves after blowout, road shutout loss…Jets offense getting smiley faces on playbooks after going three (3)-and-out on first five (5) possessions…Next Loss: at Kansas City
2. NFC East (5-18-1) – Alleged NFL division continues to make mockery of race for Pete Rozelle Award, issued to NFL’s worst division – never particularly easy to do…B-10 pollsters “pretty sure” division first ever to have every team ranked in same survey in “like, forever, dude”.
3. Washington Whatevers (1-5; lost to NY Giants 20-19) – Playing for loss on the road – solid B-10 strategy – Whatevers secure loss with missed two (2)-point conversion with 36 seconds left in game…Current five (5)-game skid best amongst NFL’s victoried teams…Next Loss: Dallas
4. Jacksonville Jaguars (1-5; lost to Detroit 34-16) – Despite strength of NFC East in 2020 Jaguars will remain in hunt for first B-10 title if they can avoid annual title-chance depleting two (2)-game win streak…Current five (5)-game skid tied with Washington as best among league’s one (1)-win teams…Next Loss: at Los Angeles Chargers
5. Dallas Cowboys (2-4; lost to Arizona 38-10 ) – 2020 B-10 field so strong not even blowout home loss, hatred of Jerry Jones, enough to get Cowboys on B-10 medal stand…Still in first place, Cowboys looking to become first team to win division, B-10 title in same season…Next Loss: at Washington
6. Houston Texans (1-5; lost to Tennessee 42-36) – Texans back on losing schneid – not to mention B-10’s patented TitleTrak Radar (TTR) following divisional road loss…Texans defense huge, blowing two (2) second-half leads …Next Loss: Green Bay
7. Minnesota Vikings (1-5; lost to Atlanta 40-23) – Vikings another team back on TitleTrak Radar (TTR) following blowout home loss to last week’s #2 team…Consistent defense easily overcomes offense that somehow manages 23 second-half points…Next Loss: at Green Bay (11/1)
8. Cincinnati Bengals (1-4-1; lost to Indianapolis 31-27) – A B-10 legacy team, Bengals trying to shed title of worst team never to win B-10 title this year…With win over Jaguars, tie against Eagles, B-10 pollsters “pretty sure” they have no idea how to award strength-of-schedule points…Next Loss: Cleveland
9. Philadelphia Eagles (1-4-1; lost to Baltimore 30-28) – Game not as close as score indicated as Eagles offense didn’t put points on board until fourth quarter against some Raven booster club members who made trip and suited up…Next Loss: New York Giants
10. New York Giants (1-5; defeated Washington 20-19) – Bad but not bad enough Giants unable to overcome even lousier Washington team, as defense scores go-ahead touchdown off of fumble recovery…Would have been ranked higher, except current 1-5 mark puts them right in thick of race for NFC East title…Next Loss: at Philadelphia
This Week’s Clash of the Titans: Dallas at Washington
This Is Don Criqui Reporting: New York Giants at Philadelphia
