The Daily Dose/August 1, 2020
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy
Leading Off
Notes from our human experience.
THIS WHOLE ITEM IS GOING TO BE DRY, TECHNICAL MATTER, ISN’T IT?: One of our favorite reads is the baseball record book and we recently got our 2020 edition and we weren’t particularly surprised to find that browsing through it remains a lot of fun.
As you no doubt might, we have our fave records.
Oh, Jesus H: Our all-time fave is a record we put the work into finding out: which was the oldest record in the book, something we know you’ve probably wondered about, too.
Final Answer: This turned out to go all the way back to the earliest days of the National League – 1876, it’s first season – when, on April 29 John Carbine, a first baseman for the Louisville Grays, made five errors, a record for first basemen that still stands, though it has been tied several times. Based on what time the other games that day started, it was either the eighth, ninth or tenth game in National League history.
Live, You Are There Coverage: There are a few we were at. Our favorite came on April 13, 1987, in San Diego. We were in the Navy and it was the Padres’ home opener and they were playing the Giants and the Padres became the first team in major league history to hit three home runs to start a game as Marvell Wynne, Tony Gwynn and John Kruk knocked around Roger Mason. This feat has been equaled five times since.
FunFacts: My brother and I were in St Louis on July 10, 1987, when the Giants tied the National League record by playing in their fourth consecutive extra-inning game. On Sept 4, 1985, also in San Diego, Gary Carter tied the record for most home runs in consecutive games, hitting his fourth and fifth. Also in San Diego, in 1990, we saw Eddie Murray of the Dodgers tie Mickey Mantle’s mark with this 10th game hitting home runs from both sides of the plate.
Close But No Cigar: One record we were in a position to see but which didn’t pan out was Don Mattingly breaking the record for most consecutive games with a home run. He had tied the record at eight the night before at Texas and my brother and I happened to be in Oklahoma at the time and we scurried down and got pretty good seats but Mattingly didn’t homer.
The Bottom Line: Uh, there’s no bottom line because there was no point to this column – hardly the Upset of the Year – other than to share something enjoyable with you. Apologies are issued.
Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually.
The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow buys the other flavor of his fave chicken salad. Today’s Diary.
Just for funsies, ol’ Sparrow recently purchased the other flavor of that new chicken salad the retailer has that both the cat and I like…The first one I bought has cranberries and some other goodies in it and the other one says on the label it’s rotisserie flavored…It would be a shame to pass the rest of my life not knowing if the rotisserie flavor is better then the first flavor, and it turned out to be pretty good…Not too bad, as Pa Sparrow would have said, a compliment from him…The cat liked it, too, but I could put some paper clips braised in motor oil on my plate and she’d like it…It was a notch below the original stuff, but if the retailer happens to be out of the original stuff at some time, then it is good to know the rotisserie stuff will do.
Backstairs at the Monte Carlo: X-ray and Gaylon break up a pot smoking ring.
Let me tell you something, you’ve been smoking dope in your room and see three (3) security officers standing outside your door when you exit, there is a high degree of probability it is not a coincidence. One of them made some lame comment about whether we had the key situation worked out, but they knew: they were in as much trouble as we wanted to make for them; you could see they were all waiting eagerly to see how bad it was going to be.
Two of the guys looked like they were going to crap their pants. X-Ray is black and we both shave our heads and we may well have looked like the DEA to them. You could see visions of calls home for bail money and expulsions from the Optimist Club dancing in their heads.
Click here for the first two months of complimentary entries.
Criminals, Courtesans and Constables: Chapter 4: Monica and the Games: Our hero helps cause havoc at the Games and spends some quality time with Monica.
Eventually, it was time to part. We both had to get back to work. Her client was arriving the following day and I had to get back to the Firm. We said goodbye in the suite, after lunch, her eyes betraying the breezy goodbye she offered while a stake was driven through me heart. I wanted to warn her to stay away from a certain train in the middle of a certain night but I couldn’t do that to my comrades at the Firm. Besides, the chances of Monica being on a public train with her client at the hour were about as likely as planetary alignment, so I didn’t worry about it.
Too much.
Valued Readers,
This is the last complimentary chapter. Click on the button to read the entire ebook for only $4.99, a price which also gets you access to The Diary of a Nobody and Backstairs at the Monte Carlo.
Many thanks for reading,
On This Date
History’s long march to today.
In 1966 – Charles Whitman, a 25-year-old student at the University of Texas in Austin, goes on a shooting spree from the tower of the university’s Main Building. Whitman arrived on campus about 11:30 and killed three people on his way to the observation deck, from which he began firing about 20 minutes later, killing 13 more and injuring 31. Whitman would be shot and killed by Austin police officers after 96 minutes of shooting. The final death toll of 18 includes Whitman, an unborn child and a victim who died in 2001 from injuries suffered in the attack. The total does not include his mother and his wife, whom he had killed just after midnight.
In 1924 – Dazzy Vance of the Brooklyn Robins ties the major league record for most consecutive strikeouts (from the 60-foot, 6-inch distance) in a 4-0 win over the Chicago Cubs. Vance struck out seven straight, the last out of the first and all three batters in the second and third innings to the mark established by Hook Wiltsie of the New York Giants in 1906 and later tied by Van Mungo in 1936. The record was broken in 1953 when Max Surkont of the Milwaukee Braves struck out eight consecutive Cincinnati Reds and the record is now held by Tom Seaver of the New York Mets, who struck out ten straight in 1970.
In 1964 – The Beatles are at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the first of two consecutive weeks with A Hard Day’s Night. It was Beatles’ eleventh Top 40 hit and their fifth of a Hot 100 record 20 #1 songs. The song went to #1 in nine other countries, including Norway, South Africa and Great Britain and was Billboard’s 13th biggest song of the year. The song was mainly written by John Lennon, with some help from Paul McCartney, and was inspired by something Ringo Starr had said after a particularly long recording session.
Quotebook
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.
I never could quite make it. These thoughts are too much for me – Charles Whitman, last written words, 8/1/1965
Answer To The Last Trivia Question
It’s not who you know, but what you know.
Ty Cobb batted over .400 three times in his career: 1911 (.419), 1912 (.409) and 1922 (.401). Three is a major league record shared with Ed Delahanty and Rogers Hornsby.
Today’s Stumper
Cheaper than Trivia Night at the bar.
How many total weeks did the Beatles spend at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100? – Answer next time!
