The Daily Dose/April 25, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy
Leading Off
One of life’s great prizes is when something long-awaited but never guaranteed happens. Like you, we’ve had our share of these over the years and the one we are going to talk about today is jury duty because it came close to happening a second time this week. We were in possession of a jury summons but I suspect the guy or gal copped a plea because the trial was canceled.
We go way back with jury duty because Dad seemed to get it every three weeks and while he wouldn’t talk about the trial while it was going on of course, he would afterward and I always loved hearing his jury duty stories and could not wait until I was on a jury of my own.
It was a long wait. One time, in our 20s in California, we were actually in the jury box sitting right next to this babe and we’re thinking “hot damn, made it” when the nitwit who got his law license in a Cracker Jack box and who was masquerading as an attorney for the local water utility thanked me for stopping by before kicking me out. I was a newspaper reporter at the time and that might have had something to do with it, but who knows?
Ten years ago, though, it happened, the long wait was over, we were actually on a jury, and the foreman no less…We found a kid guilty of drunk driving but not guilty of causing significant bodily harm, or something like that…On the way up the very slow elevator at the Las Vegas courthouse, the bailiff assigned to protect us joked there was a nice three-month civil trial waiting for us and the elevator was so slow a guy was actually sitting on the floor and he must have been on trial for something because he reminded us of the presumption of innocence all accused enjoy in this country, a line which still makes us laugh.
But the last couple of times we’ve received a summons we never even had to go in. Oh well. We’ll keep hoping, and if you’re one of those who dreds jury duty, consider embracing it. It’s a nice civic duty and who knows, your story may inspire your kids or grandkids to want to be jurors one day.
Today At The Site
The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow is back in the big city. It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.
The light rail was pretty efficient…I paid $6 for a day pass but unless there is some high tech tracking method I don’t know about, I could have not paid and gotten away with it because nobody asked to see my pass…I remember riding the subways back east and there was no way you were getting on the train without having shown your pass to someone.
The drivel simply doesn’t stop: please click on the button to read The Diary of a Nobody. $5.99 includes all entries, past, present, and future.
Criminals, Courtesans, and Constables: Friends, my latest novel is now available, for $3.99 until later this week when the price goes up a couple of bucks. Criminals, Courtesans, and Constables is about a nice guy who runs high-class call girls in and out of 5-star suites and throne rooms, collects ransoms and runs from the constables. Hilarity ensues. Seriously.
Click here to read excerpts and a sample chapter.
On This Date
In 1988 – One week after being found guilty in Israel for war crimes committed in World War II, John Demjanjuk – a Ukranian born naturalized America citizen who was then 68-years-old – is sentenced to death by hanging. Demjanjuk’s conviction would be overturned by the Israeli Supreme Court in 1993, his US citizenship reinstated, only to be lost again when he was deported to Germany in 2009 to face similar charges. He was convicted again, but died in 2012 while his appeals were still pending.
In 2001 – Rickey Henderson of the San Diego Padres becomes the all-time walks leader in the major leagues, drawing a base on balls for the 2,063rd time. The walk was issued by Jose Mesa of the Philadelphia Phillies, and Henderson broke the record that had been held by Babe Ruth. Henderson would retire with 2,190 career walks, and the record is now held by Barry Bonds with 2,558.
In 1953 – (How Much Is) That Doggie in the Window?, a novelty song by Patti Page, is at #1 on Billboard’s Best Sellers in Stores chart – a predecessor of the Hot 100 – for the sixth of eight consecutive weeks. It was the 13th of 23 Top 10 hits for Page and her fourth and final #1. The song also went to #1 in Australia and Luxembourg and was the first #1 song in America to have a question mark in the title.
Quotebook
The people are quite willing to go to sleep if they are never called upon.
Clay Jenkinson
As Thomas Jefferson
Answer To The Last Trivia Question
The Minneapolis/Los Angeles Lakers (1952-54; 2000-02) and the Chicago Bulls (1991-93; 1996-98 are the other NBA teams besides the Boston Celtics to win at least three consecutive NBA titles.
Today’s Stumper
Who is the only person executed by Israel for war crimes? – Answer next time!
