It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…
Saturday, February 15
Both Keenan and the AGM were there when we reported for duty…Keenan because it was his assigned shift, the AGM to supervise a Valentine’s Day bash in the restautant…They had a pretty good crowd. too, and a DJ playing music whose only instrument appeared to be the bass.
The big news is, again, that the new nite auditor took the Two Keys home with him…This is bad because we could not find a key fob in the key box…Stupidly, we went to Houskeeping to steal one of theirs, stupid because you need a fob to open both their doors which, of course, we didn’t have.
Sigh…But on our way back to the front desk, it occurred to us the AGM could recharge our expired key fob, and from there, it was a simple matter of rustling up a hard key, so everything worked out.
Recall Mr and Mrs AGM will be parents here toward the end of the month…He said the Mrs is now at three centimeters and when we looked at him blankly – because we have yet to reproduce – he explained that when dilation – pr whatever it’s called – got to four centimeters, the kid was probably going to drop in fairly short order…He noted, too, that if the kid came soon enuff he wouldn’t have to pay his insurance deductible…We noted, just to make pests of ourselves, that if that was the case, the kid would be out of the house two days earlier, too, which something to look forward to.
The Assistant Front Desk Manager (AFDM) was at the bar, too, enjoying the restaurant’s extended hours tonight to drink some and enjoy a pretty good-looking pizza…There was a lot going on at the front desk and he tried to tell us about it, but we showed him a palm and told him he was off the clock, not to worry about anything, and to enjoy his nite…He seemed grateful because he was on the way to inebriation, and explaining things could be difficult.
Then a travel agent called to discuss an arrival for Saturday nite…First, tho, he asked me to spell my name…No, we were not going to do that…One, English was probably his 17th language; it could take weeks to spell my name…Two, we had guests in front of us, so we merely asked how we could best be of service…He got the point
He wanted to discuss a reservation arriving Saturday nite…It was a 4-nite stay and the agent said the guest would not be arriving until Sunday and could they cancel Saturday nite’s stay without penalty…We checked the reservation out, and it was booked online – hardly the Upset of the Year because we were talking to a travel agent – and we told him we were unable to alter the reservation in any way…Like a jackass, he tried rephrasing the question, and not only did we repeat that we were unable to alter the reservation, we had guests in front of us and we were unable to help him further…He never did get the spelling of my name, which he had gotten wrong in the first place.
The big news at the gym is our membership expired…This wasn’t a bulletin; we had asked about it last week because our instincts declared it was about time, but the dumb broad manning the desk said it didn’t come due until March…All right…We thought differently, but she was looking right at the goddamned fucking screen, so the benefit of the doubt was immediately issued.
She was wrong…Gym access is on an app and we opened the app and went to open the door and BOOM: ACCESS DENIED!!!…Sigh…I knew we were right…We were able to get in because there was a youth basketball tournament going on and the door was open, and while there was a tournament director there, there was nobody from the gym there, so we couldn’t renew…There will be no one there Sunday, and Monday is an effing holiday, so it won’t be until Tuesday morning until we can get in and renew…In the meantime, it will be two days of rest of ol’ Sparrow.
Sparrow’s Sleep Log: 1030 Saturday until 1730 Saturday…7.0 hours for the day and 51.5 hours for the week, hardly a PB, but regular readers of this crap know that anything over 50 hours is the goal…God bless all of you.
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The Diary of a Nobody is a novel. All elements are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Anything else is a coincidence.
The Diary of a Nobody was inspired by the 19th-century British novel of the same name.
Coming soon! Gaylon’s books in actual book form!
