It’s Read Free Sunday at The Diary.
It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…
Saturday, December 11
There was a bit of intrigue at the front desk tonite…It was about 2330 and it had been sufficiently busy that ol’ Sparrow had just started in counting the cash drawers when two gents approach the front desk…One gent points at the drawer being counted and says it’s OK for me to finish “what you’re doing” but they do have something important to discuss…The other guy looks like the cop he turned out to be so something’s up, but since neither was holding a dagger dripping with blood, I finished counting the quarters and then closed the drawer and asked how I could be of service.
The gent, Mr N, wanted to know if Amy was still here…I forget the other guy’s name, but he ID’d himself as a cop, surprise surprise…Anyway, I said no, Amy went and he said a guest tried to “solicit” two girls on the high school basketball team he coaches to join him in his room…The guest was identified only as a Hispanic male, 30ish, brown pants and wearing one of those yellow reflector vests…Mr N said at 2230 he had seen Amy sell him some ice cream…The guest was not further identified.
Well, you don’t have to be Joe Friday to know you can’t go knocking on the door of every male Mexican guest because there are several working Hispanics in house…You can’t call the police because there isn’t a suspect but you just can’t say thank you and go about your business, either…You have to do something, so I called Amy, who was driving home to the next county and didn’t answer so I left a message and the two left the front desk…(The call was made from the back office, by the by.)…Later, Amy called back and said she didn’t know who the guest was and then I texted Brandon, advising that if he was up to please call, but if not, it could wait till morning.
Brandon called back immediately and I explained matters…He said he would be in in the morning to review video coverage and he would take it from there…He asked me to email him a summary, to include Mr N’s phone number, and to cc AGM Candace and GM Andy as well…I then called Mr N to update him, which he appreciated, tho he didn’t entirely buy that Amy didn’t know who the guest was.
It was busy from the get-go…We were sold out with basketball teams and last-minute skiers taking advantage of the first decent snow of the season and 201 needed two comforters while 164 requested a wine opener…Since they came at the same time, I delivered wine opener myself and my knock was answered by a rather dapper young black guy and behind him was a very pretty younger white lady who may or may not have attained our state’s legal age regarding the consumption of beverages requiring a wine opener to open…About 90 minutes later I walked past the room and they were still talking and the tone indicated either one or both of them had not yet decided to put out, a bit of an upset because, well, you know, hubba-hubba, they both looked ready for duty.
My only real fear working a hotel front desk is a guest requesting a plunger…Fortunately, this is rather rare, tho this morning, at about 0615, the couple in 116 came up and requested one…I don’t like these because plunging someone else’s toilet is gross but ol’ Sparrow got a break this morning: the husband knew his way around a plugged toilet and said he’d take care of it, probably sensing ol’ Sparrow would be completely useless here, and he was back a few minutes later reporting everything was OK, which was a relief for yours truly.
The hotel Christmas party was tonite, at a pretty nice Mexican restaurant the company owns here in town…This is really the only time yours truly regrets being the nite auditor: the hotel provides rooms and ground transportation to and from and it’s a great opportunity to get totally smashed on free, company booze with utter impunity…Unless you’re reporting for duty later that night…In that case, you have a modest amount of champagne and that’s it.
The seating was pretty awkward, with a lot of booths, but it was all right and I ended up sitting with Heidi and Mr Heidi, who’d I’d seen before but had never met…The food, overall, wasn’t too bad – a compliment for Pa Sparrow…I’ll tell you what, tho, those jalapeno popper deals were really good, better than anything else, and I told the server who was bringing them around that he was a dead man if he didn’t stop by our table first every time he walked out of the kitchen…The buffet wasn’t too bad…The shrimp was good and the carne asada was really good, but that chicken stuff with cashews was only all right.
I was a loser in the drawing for the nice prizes – like iPads and InstaPots – but the consolation prize was a $50 gift certificate to the restaurant, which isn’t too bad…My white elephant prize blew tho: one of those large picture frames that hold several pics, something there is some zero use for at The Shire…At Mr Heidi’s behest, I put it on the table propped up against the wall “to get it some action” in the hopes somebody would take it from me and allow me to pick something else, but no dice…
Some prizes blew, including two waffle irons that appeared to be the size of a washrag…Mr Heidi actually noticed this first, pointing out the small box and noting it would take all morning to feed a large family with waffles that size.
Sparrow’s Sleep Log: 0830 Saturday until 1330 Saturday…5.0 hours for the day and an even-Steven 50.0 hours for the week.
It should’ve been more but after waking up from a rather pleasant dream I looked at the clock, realized the alarm would be going off in three hours and couldn’t get back to sleep…Still, tho, I think this week establishes the 50-hour sleep week (50HSW) as the new normal.
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The Diary of a Nobody is a novel. All elements are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Anything else is a coincidence.
It was inspired by the 19th-century British novel of the same name.
Gaylon’s books can also be found at The Reading Salon.
