The Daily Dose/March 17, 2026
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.

3…2…1…Don’t Blast Off: We are on record here as saying that our country is a shell of its former self. Our favorite example of this is our space program, because the only country to put humans on the moon can no longer even send anyone into orbit. 

Dry, Technical Matter: Now, we’re certainly efforting. The Artemis project is designed to send us back to the moon, but it is years behind schedule, and future launch dates for Artemis II’s manned mission can now cynically be regarded as dates when the project’s next delays will be announced. 

Sigh: Our space program could’ve been so great, but plot our progress after Apollo on a graph, and you’ve got a perpendicular line. Regular readers of this crap know we are of the feeling we could’ve had people on Mars in the 1980s if we wanted to. But we didn’t want to, and good luck to everyone over 50 seeing it in their lifetime. 

Fly In The Ointment: The Aretmis delays aren’t really a surprise because we are a different country now than we were in the Apollo era. We are a country where three-quarters of us (including us, frankly) are overweight, and we are watching multiple hours of TV a day, a figure that do not include the scrolling that is now a mainstay of American life.

Write This Down: Friends, if you don’t think that has something to do with it, you are high, legally in more and more states. Long ago, America stopped dreaming and started settling, a full belly being more content than adventurous. 

The Bottom Line: The world needs an America that is innovating and pushing boundaries and setting the pace for a world that accomplishes things. Instead, we’ve devolved into a country that has long been a partisan, fractured, and bickering mess and has seen fit to twice elect as president a man of no moral or intellectual substance. We are paying the price for it. We’d be surprised if we have humans back on the moon before this decade is out.  

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow takes a walk. Today’s Diary. 

It was cool, but hardly cold, and there wasn’t even a lite breeze, either, wonderful elements for a walk…We did two miles, too: one mile total to and from the high school and four laps around the track once we were there…

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On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 1776 – The Siege of Boston in the American Revolution ends when British troops sail out of Boston Harbor. The seige had begun in April 1775 after the Battles of Lexington and Concord when Massachusetts militias blocked further land access. Though the British outnumbered the Americans, they continually lacked food, fuel, and other supplies and retreated to Nova Scotia. Some communities in the area celebrate today as Evacuation Day. 

In 1893 – What would become the Stanley Cup is awarded for the first time, when the Dominion Hockey Challenge Cup is awarded to the Montreal Hockey Club for winning the Amateur Hockey Association of Canada championship. It was the first of four Stanley Cup titles for Montreal. The Cup was donated by Frederick Stanley, the governor-general of Canada, and would later be known as the Stanley Cup. 

In 1962 – Sheb Wooley is at #1 on Billboard’s country chart – then known as the Hot C&W Sides chart – for the only week with That’s My Pa. It was the first of eight Top 40 country hits for Wooley and remains his only #1, and in 1958, Wooley spent six weeks at #1 on the Billboard pop chart with The Purple People Eater. Wooley later starred in TV and movie westerns and was the voice behind the common TV and movie effect known as the Wilhelm Scream. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

…he who has nothing to lose can afford all risks.
Harriet Beecher Stowe
Uncle Tom’s Cabin

Answer To The Last Trivia Questions
Knowledge is power.

Augustus succeeded Julius Caesar as leader of the Roman Empire. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

When did the American Revolution officially end? – Answer next time!

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Treaured Reader(s), The Daily Dose is enjoying a well-earned day off. It will return.

Click here to read The Diary of a Nobody.

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The Daily Dose/March 15, 2026
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

The Sunday Bottom 5
A ranking of some things. 

1. War With Iran – America is dead…It’s all over…The country that won World War II is bombing schoolgirls now…Without an imminent threat and with no strategic or tactical advantage to be gained, it’s a genocide now, the only goal to kill as many Iranians as possible…Sunday Bottom 5 pollsters “strongly suspect” both our country and our planet deserve better than this. 

2. Artemis II – US breathless as NASA sets April 1 as the newest date for manned mission to orbit moon to be delayed in project that hasn’t flown since 2022…Project was first scheduled to launch in 2019, and most recent delays were for the same hydrogen leak, which shows either negligence, incompetence or, as likely as not, both at NASA 

3. USA! USA! – The 3-hole staple…Seven decades into TV and fast food being focal points of American life, we are well-fed and well-entertained and not too much interested in fussin’ over things – like lies, ignorance and war – that do not directly threaten it…Yet…It will, though, soon enough, because ignorance is the standard in America now. 

4. World Cup – Like the upcoming, inevitable Artemis II delays, Sunday Bottom 5 pollsters “pretty sure” upcoming soccer tournament facing, at minimum, significant upheaval in both participating teams and locations, and, at worst, postponement or, our favorite, outright cancellation…Could become temporary 3-hole staple if enough participating countries end up at war with each other.  

5. Donald Trump Fact Check: – Click here for the latest lies…Courtesy of the AP. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow gets to use his Spanglish. Today’s Diary. 

So we dive in on the check-in process and then some tall, skinny f*ck who’s whiter than me comes by and starts throwing out Spanish like he’s the Frito Bandito and shit…

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Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

Editor’s Note: due to time constraints, these entries ran a few years ago.

In 44 BC – Roman dictator Julius Caesar, head of the Roman Republic, is assassinated, stabbed to death in the Theater of Pompey in Rome. After an initial glancing blow by a senator named Casca, others joined in, and History reports Caesar was stabbed 23 times. The assassins fled after doing their work, and Caesar was eventually removed by three slaves and later cremated. The date is known as the Ides of March, a day in Rome set aside for religious observances and the settlement of debts. 

In 1869 – The National Association of Base Ball Players authorizes the Cincinnati Red Stockings to become the first professional baseball team in the US. The Red Stockings would sign ten players through November, play their first game in May, and go 57-0 on the year. The team folded in 1870 and did not play in the National Association (1871-75), though a Cincinnati team was a charter member of the National League in 1876. The current Cincinnati Reds formed in the American Association in 1881 and joined the National League in 1890. 

In 1975 – The Doobie Brothers are at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the only week with Black Water. It was the sixth of 16 Top 40 hits for the group, their second of five Top 10 songs, and was their first of two #1s (What a Fool Believes, one week, 1979). The song also peaked at #11 in Canada and was Billboard’s 15th-biggest song of the year. The Doobie Brothers’ last appearance on a Billboard singles chart was in 2011 when A Brighter Day peaked at #18 on the Adult Contemporary chart. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

I felt that there could be no turning back and that I was engaging in an adventure the meaning of which I thoroughly understood.
Capt. Joshua Slocum
Sailing Alone Around The World

Answer To The Last Trivia Questions
Knowledge is power.

The British Royal Navy was established in 1546 by King Henry VIII.  

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

Who succeeded Julius Caesar as emperor of Rome? – Answer next time!

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The Daily Dose/March 14, 2026
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.

OH BOY, WATCH OUT: Long-time readers of this crap know we are always looking for an excuse to write the Sports Records That Will Never Be Broken Column. We have an excuse today, because this week Bam Adebayo of the Miami Heat scored 83 points in a game against the Washington Wizards. It was the second-most points ever scored in an NBA game, topping Kobe Bryant’s 81-point game in 2006 and falling shy of Wilt Chamberlain’s 100-point effort in 1962.

Here We Go: Which begs the question: is Chamberlain’s game a record that will never be broken? Hell, we don’t know, but we think it can be, our theory being if someone did something once, someone can do it again. This doesn’t mean it will be, merely that we think it can be broken.

Stop Us If You’ve Heard This Before: The one Chamberlain record that will not be broken is his 55-rebound performance in 1960. Good gravy, that it happened once is incredible because that is one rebound every minute and seven more besides. Heck, the most rebounds anyone has had this century is 31, by Kevin Love in 2010. 

Standard Disclaimer: Records set in an era when games were played differently are not eligible for this list. Nobody will ever win 511 major league games or lose 315 games like Cy Young did because pitchers don’t throw that much anymore. 

Dry, Technical Matter: For our money, the other records we think will never be broken are Ted Williams .485 career on-base percentage, Johnny Vander Meer’s consecutive no-hitters, and the 70-68 fifth set by John Isner and Nicholas Mahut at Wimbledon in 2010. Wayne Gretzky’s NHL career and seasonal assists records are safe, too. 

The Bottom Line: Go ahead, have at it, agree or disagree to your heart’s content. Cal Ripken Jr.’s consecutive games played streak is always trotted out in these discussions, but someone motivated enough could do it again, especially with modern nutrition and training methods keeping players in better and better shape. And it should be noted that rule changes mean the Isner/Mahut record will never be broken, as the rules now make it impossible.

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow deals with a demented gentleman. Today’s Diary. 

As noted, we’ve dealt with dementia, and he could’ve ended up rattling off a take-out order…It could’ve been anything…

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Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In  1757 – British Royal Navy Admiral John Byng is executed on board the HMS Monarch. Byng had been condemned for failing to relieve British troops at the Battle of Minorca, having elected to take his fleet to Gibraltar for repair instead. After King George II refused clemency, Byng was taken to the quarterdeck of the Monarch, allowed to kneel on a pillow, and dropped his handkerchief when he was ready to die. Byng had served in the Royal Navy since 1718, when he was 14. 

In 1960- Wilt Chamberlain of the Philadelphia Warriors establishes a new NBA record for most points in a playoff game in a 132-112 win over the Syracuse Nationals. Chamberlain had 53 points, breaking the record of 51 points established by Bob Cousy of the Boston Celtics in 1953. Chamberlain broke this record with 56 points in 1962, and the record is now 63 points by Michael Jordan in 1986. The win gave the Warriors the series win in three games. They would lose the Eastern Division finals to Boston in six games. 

In 2009 – Flo Rida featuring Kesha is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the third of six consecutive weeks with Right Round. The song also went to #1 in seven other countries, including Bulgaria and Great Britain, at #63 on Billboard’s Hot R&B/Hip-Hop Songs chart, and was Billboard’s 6th-biggest song of the year. It was the first of three #1 songs for Flo Rida and was the first of four #1s for Kesha.

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

Where was all this infinitesimal matter before it was set in motion by mind?/Everywhere./No real answer./Perhaps no real question.
Gore Vidal
Creation

Answer To The Last Trivia Questions
Knowledge is power.

Galusha Grow was the Speaker of the House in 1862. A Republican, he served from 1861-63. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

When was the British Royal Navy established? – Answer next time! 

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