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The Drivel You Need. The Name You Trust.
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The Daily Dose/Friday, March 27, 2026
The Daily Dose/March 27, 2026
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™
Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.
FABULOUS: After a month, we have decided to send ground troops to Iran. To what end? This war already made no sense: Iran was in no way, shape, or form an imminent threat to us. After a month of aerial bombardment, they are even less of a threat
Dry, Technical Matter: Members of the 82nd Airborne are already in route or will be soon enough. The plan is for them to conduct specific missions and not general ground combat, but war being war and Trump being Trump, there is no reason to take that seriously.
Stop Us If You’ve Heard This Before: This war is as illegal as it is immoral. It was not declared by Congress – just like every other war we’ve fought since World War II – as mandated in the Constitution, and for the love of all that is sacred, we bombed schoolgirls, something we should be condemned for every hour on the hour by every thinking person on this planet.
Elect The Clown, Watch The Circus: We elected this. We knew Donald Trump was an ignorant liar, a man of no moral or intellectual substance, and twice we’ve elected him president. We deserve everything we’re getting. We’ve settled for idiocy when we deserve leadership. Everyone in this country has something to answer for: the administration that bombed schoolgirls, and we, the people who elected it.
The Bottom Line: There is no way this ends well. America has a long history of long, drawn-out wars in the region, and those were wars that actually had some semblance of a plan, something sorely lacking in our war with Iran. America has been at war for 208 of her 249 years of independence, and no nation has survived perpetual war. America will not be the first.
Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually.
The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow makes some travel plans. Today’s Diary.
The big news is we are all set for the Minor Party’s convention in the big city.next month…And we will be spending a nite at the 5-star resort, too…I am not making either of those things up…
———
Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.
Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device.
———
On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it.
In 1977 – Two aircraft collide on a foggy runway at an airport in the Canary Islands, off the coast of northwest Africa. A KLM Boeing 747 had begun its takeoff run when it collided with the starboard side of a Pan Am Boeing 747 that was on the runway. 583 people died, and only 61 survived. An investigation showed the KLM aircraft was under the impression it had permission to take off, and after some initial resistance, KLM acknowledged its crew was responsible for the crash. It remains the deadliest accident in aviation history.
In 1945 – The Oklahoma State Cowboys win the NCAA basketball championship, defeating the New York University Violets 49-45 at Madison Square Garden. It was the first of two titles for the Cowboys and was the first of three runner-up finishes for the Violets, the last two in Division III. The tournament featured eight teams, and a third-place game wasn’t played. NYU disbanded its team in 1971, and returned as a Division III team in 1983.
In 1961 – Elvis Presley is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the second and final consecutive week with Surrender. The song also went to #1 in four other countries – including Italy and Great Britain – and was Billboard’s 51st-biggest song of the year. It was the 15th of 17 #1 songs for Presley, a mark now good for third on the all-time Hot 100 list, behind Mariah Carey (19) and the Beatles (20).
Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.
It is not the first steps but the last ones that are most difficult.
Jean-Francois Steiner
Treblinka
Answer To The Last Trivia Questions
Knowledge is power.
The Pac-12 and the ACC each have won 15 NCAA men’s basketball titles, the most of any conference.
Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.
How many #1 songs did Elvis have in Canada? – Answer next time!
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The Daily Dose/Thursday, March 26, 2026
The Daily Dose/March 26, 2026
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™
Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.
Leading Off will return.
Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually.
The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow tolerates a yapper at tai chi class. Today’s Diary.
Our own theory when receiving any kind of expert instruction is to keep our mouth shut, and this is even more so with tai chi because the focus is on quiet and spirituality…This includes butting in with questions because our experience is our question will, invariably, be answered…
———
Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.
Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device.
———
On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it.
In 1997 – San Diego County Sheriff’s Department deputies find 39 dead bodies, all mass suicide victims, at a home in northern San Diego County. The dead were members of a cult known as Heaven’s Gate and died in three groups between March 22 and 26. The deaths were designed to coincide with the closest point of approach of the Hale-Bopp comet, which was believed to have a spacecraft following it which would transport their souls to heaven. Their website is still active, though it does not appear to have been updated since before the suicides.
In 1979 – The Michigan State Spartans defeat the Indiana State Sycamores 75-64 to win the NCAA Division I basketball title at the Special Events Center at the University of Utah in Salt Lake City. It was the first of two NCAA titles for the Spartans (2000) and remains the only title game appearance for the Sycamores. It was the last Final Four played on an on-campus arena, the only one to feature 40 teams, the first where three officials were used, and with 40 million viewers remains the most-watched college basketball game ever.
In 1977 – Daryl Hall and John Oates area at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the first of two consecutive weeks with Rich Girl. It was the fourth of 34 Top 40 hits for the group, their third of 16 Top 10 songs, and their first of six #1 songs. The song also peaked at #64 on Billboard’s soul chart and was their 23rd-biggest song of the year. The song was written by Hall, who based it on a man his girlfriend knew. The gender was later changed because “rich girl” sounded better than “rich guy”.
Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.
Love is a perpetual act of selfless devotion.
Jim Bishop
The Day Christ Died
Answer To The Last Trivia Questions
Knowledge is power.
The highest speed a New York City subway achieves is 55 mph.
Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.
What conference has won the most NCAA Division I men’s basketball titles? – Answer next time!
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The Daily Dose/Tuesday, March 25, 2026
Valued Reader(s), your Daily Dose is enjoying a day off. It will return.
As penance, today’s Diary of a Nobody entry is on the house.
Cheers,
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The Diary of a Nobody/March 24
Today’s Diary entry is with Sparrow’s compliments. Enjoy.
It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…
Tuesday, March 24
The Night At The Hotel
More misfits in the lobby tonite…This time they were members of a band, plus a couple of stragglers, playing cards, and there were about ten people at the back table…We have some zero clue what they were playing, tho…We’re not Mr Vegas – tho, perhaps, one time we were – but offhand we couldn’t think of a card game for ten people that didn’t involve the removal of clothes, but game rules are hardly our lookout here…We’re a nite auditor, not a pit boss…BEsides, they’re musicians who spend a lot of time on the road, and if they have a ten-player card game, more power to them.
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The Daily Dose/Tuesday, March 24, 2026
The Daily Dose/March 24, 2026
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™
Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.
GAYLON FOR CONGRESS: VOTE EARLY, VOTE OFTEN: If it’s an even-numbered year, it must mean yours truly is running for office. And we are, pleased to announce our candidacy for the Colorado Libertarian Party’s nomination from the 2nd Congressional District.
Dry, Technical Matter: We did make some noise about running for the party’s US Senate nomination. It would not be the first time. In 2014, we earned the nomination, but missed out on two other occasions. Once, we dropped out at the convention in order to avoid a primary and accepted the District 3 nomination, and the other time we lost a primary. It’s important to be on the November ballot so, after some discussion with party officials, we decided to run for Congress.
Common Sense In Uncommon Times: We are the only announced candidate for the 2nd District nomination, though that doesn’t really mean anything. Another candidate could show up at the convention, or the convention could get its collective shorts in a knot and reject my candidacy, but neither of those is likely to happen. It is accurate to say we are the presumptive nominee.
Dry, Technical Matter: Longtime supporters no doubt remember we used to be in the 3rd District, but that changed after the 2020 census. The old district ran along the western third of the state, from the Wyoming border to the Four Corners, then out to the Great Plains. It was the largest Congressional District in the country that wasn’t an entire state, and it was actually easier to campaign for the US Senate than for Congress.
The Bottom Line: We’re not the odds on favorite, but the GOP really isn’t much of a factor in the district, and all Democrats, including our incumbent, are guilty of doing nothing while a man of no moral or intellectual substance destroys our country. So send me some money. If you’re philosophically on board with Gaylon For Congress, I deserve your support. If you’re not and you know me, send me some anyway. We have a chance to make some noise this year.
Click here to visit Gaylon’s campaign website.
Click here to cut to the chase and contribute to the campaign right now.
Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually.
The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow debuts his new sneakers. Today’s Diary.
They’re that fancy European brand, too, a hideous fluorescent lite blue color, but I recall that being the best of the lot in the 17E shoe our feet demand…
———
Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.
Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device.
———
On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it.
In 1900 – New York City mayor Robert Van Wyck breaks ground on the city’s first subway line. The first line opened in October 1904, from City Hall in lower Manhattan to 145th Street and Broadway in Harlem, with lines going to the Bronx and Brooklyn opening later. Today the system has 36 lines, 423 stations serving four boroughs, and carried 2.6 million riders last year. Elevated lines had been in use since the 1870s.
In 1936 – The Detroit Red Wings and the Montreal Maroons play the longest game in NHL history, in a 1-0 Red Wings victory in Game 1 of the Stanley Cup semifinals. The Red Wings won on a goal by Mud Bruneteau 16 minutes and 30 seconds into the sixth overtime, and won the best-of-five series in three games. It was the second six-overtime game in NHL history, the first coming on April 3, 1933 when Toronto defeated Boston 4 minutes and 46 seconds into the sixth extra period.
In 1979 – Anne Murray is at #1 on Billboard’s country chart – then known as the Hot Country Singles chart – for the first of three consecutive weeks with I Just Fall In Love Again. It was the sixth of 24 Top 10 country hits for Murray and her first of ten #1s. The song also went #1 country and pop in her native Canada, peaked at #12 on the Hot 100, and was Billboard’s #1 country song of the year. Her brother Bruce also had several Canadian hits as well
Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.
Men under the influence of interest or passion often delude themselves thoughtlessly, and do not always acknowledge even to themselves the motives upon which they really act.
Roger Taney
Answer To The Last Trivia Questions
Knowledge is power.
Barbra Streisand has won ten Grammy awards, eight competitive and two honorary.
Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.
What is the highest speed a New York City subway car can go? – Answer next time!
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The Diary of a Nobody/March 23
It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…
Friday, March 20
Cleanliness Is Next To Godliness
The big news at the hotel is Robert cleaned the back office…I am not making that up…This was no small task, either, because there had been some food from some gathering – chips, crackers, stuff like that, plus some stuff in the frig – that had been back there, plus two big green bags of presumably shredded paper, plus a lot of boxes, some broken down, some not…They were all gone, and the place was clean and organized and squared away.
– We’ve got some bigwigs coming, I heard.
Bigwigs can be a pain in the arse…To those in management and those on days and swing shifts…For the nite auditor, they are not…Even if they do come by for a chat, odds are this is not their first job in the hotel racket…In fact, there is the highest level of probability they’ve done an audit or two in their time and so they know the drill: unless they’re actually dealing crack from behind the front desk, you do not mess with the nite auditor…Especially one like me, who’s been here for years and shows up on time every nite…For his part, Robert said he’s not looking forward to having any “bigwigs” running around when he’s here because “you never know what they’re going to ask for”.
LOL
We were able to use one of our fave lines tonite at the hotel…A couple of airline pilots (overhearing a later conversation) had brought a pizza from the restaurant into the lobby and sat at the table in front of the front desk.
– Would you like me to taste test that for you, Sir???…For freshness….Obviously…It’s a service I like to provide our guests.
Trying to decide if we were serious, the pilot holding the pizza looked at the other pilot and then back at me…He decided we were kidding and offered me a slice, which we declined with a smile.
– We haven’t tested it for freshness yet, Sir…We couldn’t possibly accept a slice without knowing.
This line, hot off the presses of Sparrow’s mind, got the good laff it deserved from both pilots.
Running The Numbers
In what is hardly being hailed as the Upset of the Year, the March year-over-year numbers are down: room revenue is down 210K on 500 fewer rooms, and while the mountain doesn’t officially close for three weeks, it might as well be closed now, based on room projections for next week…They aren’t Virus Era numbers, but they ain’t that great, either.
Pumped Up Kicks
The big news – and it is huge – is that our new sneakers debuted at the gym tonite…I am not making that up…Actually, they’re new only in the sense they were worn for the first time tonite – we had actually bought them last summer, when we were walking 6-7 miles a day, but soon after we started doing our tai chi forms and never got around to taking them out of the box.
They’re that fancy European brand, too, a hideous fluorescent lite blue color, but I recall that being the best of the lot in the 17E shoe our feet demand…They are very nice, tho, as comfortable as the Fresh Foams we’d had for the three years…They were noticed, too, of all things…Jane, who works there, noticed, and so did Kevin – who wears them, too, and was able to expound their virtues at length – and Pablo noticed them, as well, tho he was on the phone and couldn’t chat about them as much as would’ve liked.
We had time for three sets of our new bo staff forms/deep breathing forms, and we got roughly 2.5 miles in in 43 minutes, not too bad, but too great, either.
Sparrow’s Sleep Log:
1130 Monday until 1630 Monday…5.0 hours for the day – a disastrous total – and 12.5 hours for the week, another depressing figure…We have some zero clue why it’s been taking us so long to fall asleep the past 2-3 weeks.
———
The Diary of a Nobody is a novel. All elements are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Anything else is a coincidence.
The Diary of a Nobody was inspired by the 19th-century British novel of the same name.
Click here to get to know Gaylon’s latest book: The Life 101 Project.
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The Daily Dose/Monday, March 23, 2026
The Daily Dose/March 23, 2026
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™
Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.
Leading Off will return.
Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually.
The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow has the latest news from Maple Street. Today’s Diary.
The big news is we saw Zach’s chickens out on Maple Street this morning…
———
Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.
Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device.
———
On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it.
In 1775 – Patrick Henry utters his famous “give me liberty or give death” line in a speech given at the Second Virginia Convention at St John’s Church in Richmond, Virginia. Henry’s speech is credited with influencing the convention to approve sending Virginian troops for service in the Revolutionary War, and Henry would later serve as Virginia’s first and sixth governor of. He would later turn down an offer from President John Adams to be ambassador to France and died in 1799.
In 1979 – Larry Holmes retains his WBC heavyweight title, defeating Ossie Ocasio of Puerto Rico with a seventh round TKO at the Hilton Hotel in Las Vegas. It was the second defense for Holmes, who won the title from Ken Norton in 1978. Holmes vacated his WBC title in 1983, and was later awarded the inaugural IBF title, a title he lost in 1985. Ocasio would later go on to hold the WBA cruiserweight title.
In 1974 – Barbra Streisand is at #1 on the Billboard 200 album chart for the second and final week with The Way We Were. It was the eleventh of 32 Top 10 albums for Streisand and her second of eleven #1 albums. The album also peaked at #3 in Canada, at #49 in Great Britain, and was Billboard’s 50th-biggest album of the year. Earlier in the year, the title track spent three weeks at #1 on the Hot 100 and was Billboard’s #1 song of the year.
Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.
Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery?Patrick Henry
3/23/1775
Answer To The Last Trivia Questions
Knowledge is power.
The NBA record for most rebounds in a game by a team is 109, done twice, by the 1955-56 St Louis Hawks and the 1960-61 Boston Celtics.
Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.
How many Grammy Awards has Barbra Streisand won? – Answer next time!
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The Diary of a Nobody/March 22
It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…
Friday, March 20
The Night At Work
It was busy tonite, but not all at once busy, they came in trickles, bothering ol’ Sparrow every 10-15 minutes or so…Most were sundry stand purchases, but some kid needed a bandage, there were a couple of arrivals, plus a gal, just back from the wedding, required make-up wipes.
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