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The Daily Dose/April 1, 2025
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.

THE LATEST FROM THE PEOPLE’S REPUBLIC OF AMERIKA: The nonsense simply does not stop spewing from the Trump Adminstration. This is not a bulletin because Donald Trump is a man of zero intellectual or moral substance. We expect ignorance and blather. From pointless, vindictive tariffs to wanting to take over Canada and Greenland, to the latest, this week’s spewing that Donald Trump is considering a third term. 

WTF?: Trump can no more consider a third term than I can consider sprouting wings and flying. It is as stupid a thing as he’s ever said, and this is from a man who believes the moon is part of Mars and that the Revolution was won by securing British airports. 

Fly In The Ointment: The Constitution is very clear on the matter, a president cannot serve more than two terms. Also, someone not eligible for the presidency cannot be elected vice-president. Donald Trump cannot serve a third term. He might try to set up a Third Reich, but he cannot continue as president past January 20, 2029. It is against the law. 

Dry, Technical Matter: Presidential term limits are found in the 22nd Amendment, which was ratified in 1951 after America got their collective shorts in a knot following Franklin Delano Roosevelt’s election to fur terms.   

The Bottom Line: What would have happened to a previous two-term president who had the gall to propose a third term for himself? He would have been laughed out of the building. But Trump does it and BOOM, it’s suddenly on the table. This is because Trump’s ignorance and lies have gotten a free pass since he announced for the GOP nomination in 2015. He found an America that is well-fed, well-entertained, and, collectively, as stupid as he is. No one has mustered the courage to tell him no.  

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow hasn’t had a day off in a while. Today’s Diary. 

We’re starting to feel it, too…Not too bad, really…I mean, we get our sleep and we’re in the gym…We sleep more or less at the same time,and we have blackout curtains, which help…And, all together now, we don’t work all that hard…

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Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 1789 – The US House of Representatives achieves its first quorum when representatives from New Jersey and Pennsylvania report for duty. The House, along with the Senate, first met on March 4, the date the new Constitution took effect, and the Senate would achieve its first quorum two days later. The House’s first order of business was to elect Frederick Muhlenberg, a Lutheran minister from Pennsylvania, Speaker of the House. The House then appointed a clerk, so they would have someone to present their credentials to. 

In 2000 – Chris Byrd wins the WBO world heavyweight title, defeating champion Vitali Klitschko when Klitschko retired after the ninth round with a shoulder injury in Berlin. It was the first championship fight for Byrd, who filled in on 10-days notice after the original opponent got sick. Byrd would lose the title later in the year to Klitschko’s brother Wladimir and would later win the IBF heavyweight title. Vitali Klitschko later held the WBC heavyweight title for eight years. 

In 1995 – Madonna is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the sixth of seven consecutive weeks with Take a Bow. It was the 28th of 38 Top 10 hits for Madonna and her eleventh of twelve #1 songs – then a record for a female solo act. The song also went to #1 in Italy and Canada, peaked at #16 in Great Britain, and was Billboard’s 8th-biggest song of the year. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

Do not falter in your determination to fulfill your destiny. Don’t follow the destiny outlined in some mystical book: Create your own.
Deng Ming-Dao
365 Tao 

Answer To The Last Trivia Questions
Knowledge is power.

The USS Kearsarge (BB-5) was the only US battleship not named after a state. It was named after a 19th-century naval vessel that was named after a mountain in New Hampshire.

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

What female solo act now holds the record for most #1 songs on the Hot 100? – Answer next time! 

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The Daily Dose/March 29, 2025
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.

QUOTE THAT SUCKER: One of the pleasures of reading is finding quotes that you want to remember, passages that make you think, that provide insights into our human experience. This allows us – if we’re open to it – to learn about ourselves and our fellow humans. It’s what you pay us writers for, and for our money, do this as well as anyone. 

Dry, Technical Matter: We began writing down quotes in 1988 in a motel room in Berkeley, California and it now has over 3,100 entries. The most frequent contributors are Gore Vidal, Will Durant, and Louis L’Amour. 

Back On Message: One of these quotes is particularly relevant right now. It’s from a book by George Carlin, about as funny and relevant a comedian as the trade has produced: 

This species could have been so great, and now everybody just wants a new Salad Shooter or sneakers with lights in them. This is what we’ve settled for.

USA! USA! This is America in a nutshell right now because America has settled. The only country to put humans on the moon – and which should’ve been the first to put them on Mars, too – can’t even put anyone into anything other than low Earth orbit anymore. Both our citizens and our government are partisan, fractured, and bickering messes. Our president is lying, ignorant, sexual predator, a petty and vindictive man who is governing us off the top of his head regardless if whether or not a decree has merit or is even legal. 

Fly In The Ointment: By and large, we’re taking it, too. Few are calling a spade a spade, calling a dictator a dictator, calling nonsense nonsense. Honestly, if Trump were evil, he never would’ve left the White House in 2021. But he’s not evil; he’s merely ignorant. But ignorance is enough to get the 2026 midterm elections canceled, and it’s enough to toss America onto History’s scrap heap along with, among others, the Roman Empire and the Soviet Union.

The Bottom Line: We tend to get what we deserve in this life, whether on the golf course, on TV, or in our government. We elected ignorance and lies. We elected a man of zero moral or intellectual substance, and we are being governed accordingly. We elected it and we deserve it.  

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow narrowly misses some yapping. Today’s Diary. 

We got a break today when Madam Blab left early, about ten minutes after we got there…Good thing, too, because she was primed for some blabbing, sighing and cooing almost constantly, as if the news of the world was bursting inside her…

———

Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 1992 – The USS Missouri (BB-63) is decommissioned for the second and final time in Long Beach, California. The ship was first commissioned in 1942 and hosted the signing of the Japanese surrender in World War II. It was deactivated after the Korean War and reactivated from 1984-1990, seeing her final action in the Gulf War in 1991. Missiouri is now a museum ship in Pearl Harbor, where her bow faces the sunken USS Arizona, standing watch over sailors still serving inside Arizona’s hull.  

In 1951 – The Boston Bruins and Toronto Maple Leafs play the last tied NHL playoff game in a 1-1, one-overtime tie in game two of the Stanely Cup semifinals in Toronto. The game was called after the first overtime due to a curfew. Previous tied playoff games had been in two-game total goal series or were games that ended tied after two 10-minute overtime periods. The Maple Leafs would win the series four games to one. 

In 1962 – Patsy Cline is at #1 on Billboard’s country chart – then known as the Hot C&W Sides chart – for the first of four consecutive weeks with She’s Got You. It was the fourth of six country Top 10s for Cline and her second and final #1. The song also peaked at #14 on the Hot 100, and in 1977, a version by Loretta Lynn also went #1 country. Cline would die the following March at age 30 in a plane crash in Tennessee.  

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

If you want to be successful in anything, you’ve got to believe in yourself; because no one else is going to do it. If you don’t do it yourself, you can rely on everyone else who’s been unsuccessful and you can sit around the bar together and cry about it. If you’re going to do it, you do it by yourself…it takes some guts to do that.
Glen Sather 

Answer To The Last Trivia Questions
Knowledge is power.

The closest Russian land to Alaska is Big Diomede Island, which is about 2.4 miles from Alaska’s Little Diomede Island.  The International Date Line runs between the two islands. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

What was the only US battleship not named after a state? – Answer next time! 

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The Daily Dose/March 30, 2025
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

The Sunday Bottom 5
A ranking of some things.

1. College Basketball – While US farts around with their brackets, there are no less than five active investigations into allegations concerning college basketball teams shaving points, some connected to NBA betting ring that got player suspended for life…Don’t be surprised when the March Madness hits the fan and tournament games are rigged, probably before this decade is out. 

2. JD Vance – Vice President and top Trump toady visits Greenland, a land US has wanted since the Civil War, where welcome was so warm Vance was limited to visiting US military base, where protesters could be kept out…It was a stupid trip by a witless administration, but what were we expecting from a president of zero moral or intellectual substance???

3.  People’s Republic of Amerika – The 3-hole staple…A hundred years from now all new people – including Americans, if there are any left – will wonder what in the hell compelled America to take Donald Trump seriously???…They will wonder how character and truth used to mean something in Amerika and how a real media would not have let Trump within a mile of the primaries and how a post-knowledge Amerika provided all the manure Trump needed to chart path to White House.  

4. Associated Press – Noted, respected news organization still suing to regain access to White House, as Trump also takes aim at Disney, ABC, NBC, and CBS, though there are no current investigations into his preferred network, FOX. 

5. Elon Musk Fact Check: – Click here for a list of lies from Musk concerning government fraud claims he’s made…From the New York Times  

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow uses his laptop’s new power cord. Today’s Diary. 

Everything worked out, but it was fraught with peril there for a bit…

———

Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 1867 – US Secretary of State William Seward agrees to purchase Alaska from Russia for $7.2 million, about $130 million in today’s money. The US Senate ratified the treaty in May and the official transfer occurred in October. The Russians had had a colonial presence in the area since the 18th century, but few Russians had settled there and Alaska became the 49th US state in 1959. 

In 1944 – The Montreal Canadiens establish a new NHL playoff record for most goals in a period in an 11-0 win over the Toronto Maple Leafs in the fifth and deciding game of their Stanley Cup semifinal series. The Canadiens had seven goals in the third period, breaking the record of six done by the Maples Leafs in 1936 and the record still stands. The regular season record is nine, by the Buffalo Sabers in March 1981. 

In 2013 – Baauer is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the fifth and final consecutive week with Harlem Shake. The song went to #1 in five other countries, including Greece, Brazil, and Luxembourg, peaked at #3 in Great Britain, and was Billboard’s 4th-biggest song of the year. It remains the only Hot 100 hit for Baauer, making him the eleventh of 18 ultimate one-hit wonders, an act whose only Hot 100 hit goes to #1.  

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

All national institutions of churches, whether Jewish, Christian or Turkish, appear to me no other than human inventions, set up to terrify and enslave mankind, and monopolize power and profit.
Thomas Paine 

Answer To The Last Trivia Questions
Knowledge is power.

Buck Owens’ biggest hit on the Hot 100 was I’ve Got a Tiger By the Tail, which peaked at #25 in 1965. It was his only Top 40 pop hit.

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

What is the closest Russian land to Alaksa right now? – Answer next time!

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The Daily Dose/March 29, 2025
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.

Leading Off will return. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow counsels young Daniel. Today’s Diary. 

We added that our experience is that happy women don’t cheat, further noting that our experience in this matter is rather extensive and should be treated with respect…

———

Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 2010 – Two suicide bombers attack the Moscow Metro system at separate stations about 40 minutes apart. The bombing was carried out by two women from Dagestan, a republic of Russia located near the Caspian Sea. Responsibility for the attack would later be claimed by Dokka Umarov, the leader of a group of Chechen rebels. Umarov died in 2013 after being poisoned. 

In 1998 – The Tennessee Volunteers win the NCAA women’s basketball title defeating the Louisiana Tech Techsters 93-75 in Kansas City. It was the third consecutive national title for the Volunteers and their sixth of eight overall and was the fourth and most recent 2nd-place finish for the Techsters to go along with two titles. All of Tennessee’s national titles were coached by Pat Summit. 

In 1969 – Buck Owens is at #1 on Billboard’s country chart – then known as the Hot Country Singles chart – for the first of two consecutive weeks with Who’s Going To Mow Your Lawn. It was the 26th of 40 Top 10 country hits for Owens and his 15th of 19 country #1s in a chart career that spanned from 1959-1989. The song also went #1 country in Canada and peaked at #6 on Billboard’s Bubbling Under the Hot 100 chart. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

I never saw either man lose his temper except on purpose.
Gore Vidal
Creation

Answer To The Last Trivia Questions
Knowledge is power.

The NHL record for most wins in a season by a goalie is 48, done twice, by Martin Brodeur of the New Jersey Devils in 2006-07 and Braden Holtby of the Washington Capitals in 2015-16. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

What was Buck Owen’s biggest hit on the Hot 100? – Answer next time! 

Share Gaylon! Go!